Autumn has blared its trumpets signaling its arrival of a new season. It means two things to me. One, it is one of my BFF Kathy's favorite time of the year. She sent me a text at 9am wishing me a Happy First Day of Autumn and I received a card from her in the mail last week to remind me of the occasion. Second, it is the beginning of my own season of beginnings. Being a January baby makes me Winter's Daughter and now starts to set the tone until then. It has always been that way for me. It also brings angst about the upcoming holidays which I abhor. Surprised?
For the first time, I was able to sleep in without alarms and Cabal waking me up. My angels must have warned him not to disturb his mistress. My hips didn't ache from staying in bed too long which is a detriment to sleeping in. I have to walk it out. Maybe it is because I wore my comfortable sneakers all day not my usual goddess gear for work.
By this time of the year, my autumn angst kicks in. My BFFs are on AGOL high alert from now until February 14th, AGOL's day. Last year I was too busy with work, planning parties, starting my blog and starting a new romance (comments section) with a beautiful man which was a big part of December and January. We instant messaged for hours, skyped and sent e-mails even when he vacationed in Japan for Christmas with his brother and sister-in-law. We had a lot of fun with my sending Victoria's Secret-like pics of my boobs and him being able to check them out in private at hotels and his sister-in-law's mother's house like the one below:
I also received e-mails like those below which made the holidays more bearable:
Dec. 29th: Hello you Goddess...I am having a wonderful time in Kyoto. Everything is beautiful here. The smallest opportunity to makes something gorgeous is taken. However this does not mean I have not taken the opportunity to think of you often. One of the times I stood in front of a temple and washed myself in the the smoke of a burning insense stick. There I made a moment for some stillness. And you came into my mind then...(deletion)...I have never met you, but part of me was wishing very strongly that we were snuggled together looking at the snow falling. P xxx
Dec. 31st: hello darling...just a stolen moment to say happy new year! it is fast approaching here in japan. have just eaten the most extensive japanese meal. yum. and now for the drinking! i will think of you at midnight. think of me too when midnight steals over florida. p xxx
Jan. 1st: Hello you goddess... Just been reading your last entry. Your groundhog days are over I hope. I`m certain mine are too. Not long ago I went down to the sea and stood in the chilly pre-dawn light and watched the sun rise into a new day and a new year in the land of the rising sun. I don`t think a man needs more omens than that. I am full of optimism today. Life is good and will get better. Time for a new pattern to emerge I think. I thought of you when the sun rose. It was beautiful and so are you. Have a good year Sarah. You deserve a wonderful one. P xxx
Jan. 3rd: Hello Sarah you lovely. Wednesday here in Japan. I leave on Friday and tomorrow we are going to spend a day on an island somewhere. So this could be my last note before I am back in England. I feel very free in my mind now and this holiday has done me the world of good. My head is very clear and my optimism has returned full force. A part of me is looking forward to returning to my own little home though, and being able to steal upstairs and skype my magical new friend in Florida. But while I type this to you I am looking through a screen at a little Japanese garden complete with rocks and a flowering aloe vera plant. Cats and dogs are milling about, by brother is in the shower, and my sister in law and her mum are in the onsen again. They are absolutely obsessed over hear with sitting in their hot baths. My thoughts turn to sitting in hot baths with someone special... I bet you would look lovely in an onsen. Just holding onto that thought for a moment.... Ah. My god I am going to have to stop eating when I get home. The food here is so delicious and everyone keeps trying to feed me as if I haven`t eaten for weeks. I hope all is well with you. I can`t wait to hear the wonderful warmth of your voice again. And I am mindful that it is your birthday coming up soon too. You must send me an address in meatspace so I can send something to spoil you. You are the sort of woman who deserves very much to be spoilt and pampered sometimes I think. Have a lovely week darling thing. I will speak to you over the weekend. Yours in adoration P xxx
and me receiving Valentine's and me sending Valentines (click to enlarge) to him:
It continued in the year during my UK trip: April and May.
If you think for one moment, he will be horrified at this AGOL intimate sharing, you are utterly and completely mistaken. You don't know MEBFKAY very well. I didn't post other pics, IM conversations or the erotica I've written him and the poems he has sent me. How else will he achieve fame (not notoriety) if people don't talk about him which is his dream? Why do you think I created a Wikipedia entry about him back in March? Have I lost my mind? HELL YEAH! There is beauty in truth.
MEBFKAY has a current love now. I am sure she is nice and lovely. She may not be me; the AGOL brand is not something that can be emulated. Not being egotistic, I know. He is still a beautiful man, but not always an angel. I want the world to know that I am okay with everything. I am not angry with him nor do I feel any kind of hatred towards him. My friends think I have been too kind towards him, but they are not me. They have not met him, got to know him nor see the colors and textures that make him Peter S. Kenny.
There is a Swedish proverb that I hope I am quoting correctly: We show love to the ones that deserve it the least because they are the ones that need it the most. Is there room for reconciliation? I don't know. All I did was click Next Blog in December of last year and got his page and the magic stuff above happened. For now, I have other expectations for the new year. I hope that it will be as exciting as the good part of this year and maybe even more extraordinary. Let's get through autumn first. Be on alert...
2 comments:
Season of mists and mellow fruitfulness.
The opening line from one of the most beautiful poems ever written.
Second, perhaps, to Ode to Beauty. John Keats was a rare talent who could wave a magic wand and the world he was describing would appear before your eyes. Fragile, yet enduring.
I read your comment first in my e-mail alert and it made me tear up. Thank you. I always appreciate beautiful words...
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