Tuesday, July 08, 2008

I Survived

There was no Mr. Roarke (TV's Fantasy Island) greeting me and my fellow coworkers with "Smiles Everyone" this morning. It was very silent like that angelic space between the moment we breathe in air and then exhale it.

I arrived early which surprised some people who saw me already milling about. My girlies were happy to see me back. Bridget's babysitters reported that she was on good behavior during the week and didn't give in to urges to annihilate or maim her offenders. That was good. My company was also having a layoff today. That was bad.

As the carnage mounted to get close to that 300 mark or 20% of employees, the rest of us walked around in shock and in fear of being the next victim of the scythe swinging neck-high. Tears were left by the fallen as their chairs cooled quickly from them vacating their posts. It didn't matter whether you liked or disliked the individual, someone losing their livelihood is never funny.

Bridget and I caught up in each other's lives during the day to try and get through the ordeal. While she spoke, I looked around and noticed someone had left a very pretty white silk flower lei by the entrance to my cube. It was mixed in with the ones already there. That was sweet...We had a lively lunch in the break room with my Asian mafia which resulted in someone shutting the door on us. We were laughing too hard and finding humor in the ridiculous. It was a brief respite against the gravity run amok outside the doors. The rest of the workday was followed up with mini speeches from a vice president and then a senior vice president. The icing on the day was the deluge outside. Sixty percent precipitation my ass.

I may have arrived early but I could not leave early thanks to heavy traffic and the rain. Jeffrey, Tawny's son, was in our building collecting the PCs of the fallen for security reasons. While (not so) happy hour was somewhere waiting with my friends, Jeffrey and I shared a long conversation at my desk. On the way out while walking in the corridor snaking towards the garage, I looked up and saw something startling. It was a dragonfly hanging upside down on the ceiling tile. Quickly before I lost my resolve, I snapped the pic below.



The drive home was occupied with maneuvering through the rain and me calling to update my friends on my situation. I was tired and exhausted. I had spent 10 days decompressing during my vacation at home and receiving revelations about myself only to come back and be at high stress the first day back. I am not really complaining -- I am trying to count my blessings because that is what is important. Tomorrow will be a slightly weird day on our road to understanding and healing. It will be difficult, but like the dragonfly above sometimes we have to hang on in the most unlikely spots.

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A very special Thank You to all who wished me well. Your well wishes helped me get through.

Hugs,
Sprinkles xx
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