Sunday, November 02, 2008

Comfortable with Asians

Today was Michelle's daughter Eva's second birthday picnic at Ballast Point park in South Tampa. Amy picked me up so we could carpool together. It was a little overcast and it rained a tiny bit during the afternoon...

About 60 adults and children attended. Amy and I assisted Michelle with the kids' games after lunch. She was frazzled and had too many distractions. We did Pin the Tail on the Donkey first; stickers at the end of the tails were used in lieu of the pins. When it came to the pinata, I expected the traditional style with a bat. Not this year. They bought pinatas that used ribbon strings. Each child gets to pull a ribbon string from the bottom of the pinata until one eventually pulls the one that spills the candy everywhere. Odd but safer, I guess. There were two pinatas for Eva and her cousin Aidan who was celebrating his 3rd birthday, too. The candy filling spilled quickly from both and the kids went crazy scrambling for their loot.

We all settled a bit after the games were played and cakes were served. The men were watching football on a TV plugged into the pavilion outlet while the ladies mingled. I met a couple of Michelle's husband's friends. One lady was Chinese and we enjoyed a conversation on Spam Musubi, a sushi sandwich type food made with Spam, Furikake (seaweed/wasabi sprinkles) over rice encased in a seaweed wrap. Her sister joined us and our conversation steered towards children. My own childless state was revealed and my increasing age. The sister was pregnant and already had a five year old. She shocked me by saying she was 39 -- she looked 2o and told her as much. We laughed at the old Asian age deception.

After the birthday picnic, I asked Amy if she wanted to take a tour of the big Asian grocery store downtown. We picked up a few things with Amy agog all over the sights and smells. I had one scare. Amy had ordered two fresh tilapia fish from the live tank after confirming the guys would clean them. They cleaned them all right: chopped the tail, scraped the scales and gave the fish a good rinse after eviscerating them just before double-bagging them in plastic for her. I pushed our cart through a couple of aisles and was reading something in the spice aisle. One of the fish in the bag started to flip-flop around. I was startled and freaked out. With a sheepish look at Amy, I joked that the fish had some nerve. It twitched some more after that and I told it that it was just being rude. Amy died laughing. Oh..well...yes, the fish eventually quieted down permanently. Hee.

I called Tawny in the evening and asked her if she wanted to accompany me to the store before I succumbed to the tiring events of the day. She agreed and off we went. Tawny and I exchanged stories of our recent adventures away from one another. Last night's Halloween party was a success, but she still missed my presence. You know what's great about doing normal stuff with one of your best friends? Everything. There is no pressure to be anybody but you and to share the truths that make you who you are and more importantly to be able to laugh about them out loud in between the aisles of shampoo and conditioner...

My mind kept thinking about the outing today at the park. It struck me that I miss being around an all-Asian community. What I mean is being surrounded by Asians all the time like how I grew up and lived while in the Philippines. My Asian side thirsts for more connections. The thirst is slaked a little during lunch at work with my Asian mafia and our outings. The need didn't manifest or was made known to me until the last few months. A part of me feels badly and maybe betraying a part of my life, but how can that be? I am a walking dichotomy. I am both Asian and white. When I am with Asians, my Caucasian side is what they see first and when I am with Caucasians, my Asian side is what they see first. There are worse things I suppose like running out of rice in the cupboard.


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