One is that you cannot joke about Viagra even to someone who obviously does not need it or you will get a conversation before you get to the office this morning that barely starts with good morning before a launch on how the blue pill works. That part is not enough when he feels it necessary to explain in detail on the whole physiological sense and the side effects about going blind. Good grief. I was just joking that I would be in trouble if he ever took one of those. A joke...ha-ha. All he heard was something else I cannot fathom. This also happened recently with one of my girlfriends whose husbands misunderstood the joke we were making at a party. She had to deal with her own grief. Apparently, the only male I know of who can take the joke is Playboy guru Hugh Hefner who does his own jokes publicly. Hey, it's Hef.
Two is the spines of the men I've dated apparently have secret expiration dates. They come on strong and play hard before their own insecurities begin to sneak in and take over to erode the relationship. "Focused affection" is one I heard years ago. That man didn't believe he deserved someone as nice as me. What the hell does that mean? I play naughty games, but I don't play games in the sense where the man doesn't know how I feel. There is some predictability. You treat me well, I treat you well. I can't vouch for those PMS moments. You may want to throw me a box of my favorite chocolates first. Where is the guy who wants to be treated well, be respected and at the same time...have a great time? They are mostly married if anything else is to go by.
On three occasions I have been accused of bad timing by men I've met and have gotten to know me and not necessarily in the biblical sense. What is the wrong with the men you date? Where were you 10 years ago? Why can't she be more open like you? Why have you come along when I am very married? I can't decide whether that is a slap in the face to their spouses or a compliment to me. All I can say is: You should have waited instead of settling and for the rest, the meek need not apply.
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